You’ve been whining and bitching about how you want things to look, when you should be sticking to your guns, which is bringing in customers. And, you’ve got a talent for it, so why is your face green as grass? You’ve got something he ain’t got, and he got something you ain’t got. It’s a match made in heaven, like a Les Paul and a Marshall stack – but only if you don’t abuse the shit out of him.
If you can’t leave the creative
guy alone, then at least throw in a word of encouragement every once and a
while – “you’re doing great”, “keep it up”, “rock on brother.” He needs fuel to
keep going, and last I checked, fuel ain’t free. Plus, you should be giving him
way more uninterrupted focus time.
It’s awesome when you find a
creative who can do your work, keep to deadlines and churn out masterpieces
like they’re Picasso on Adderall. But you’ve got to look at them as a depleting
asset, not as a bottomless can of juice you can keep squeezing. If you’ve got them
running a marathon and keep asking them to sprint, how do you think they’re
going to feel after a while?
Yeah, sure, some course
correction is par for the course. But there’s a time and place for that. Asking
for a fuck ton of changes on your lousy project when the creative is about to
burn out is like asking a shark to turn away when you’re the only one bleeding
out profusely in god's blue ocean. Good luck.
At the very least, use the
traffic light system.
Green light for “Go, I’m ready
to take on anything you’ve got.”
Yellow light for “I’ve been in
the frying pan for a while, and I’m starting to get crispy around the edges.”
Red light for “Stay the fuck
away, I’ve got more on my plate than you can possibly conceive or imagine.”
Ask your creative, at least once
per week, where they’re at. And, if you get the red-light treatment for longer
stretches, then get a hot clue, you fucking moron, and give them some paid time
off. Yes, I said it – PAID time off. That ain’t a four-letter word.
If you can’t give them two
weeks, then send them away for a leisurely long weekend. That’s going to do
them, and your working relationship, wonders. A few off days can give both of
you a much-needed perspective. And, if you don’t do it, guess what? Resentment
is going to build on both ends.
You’re gonna feel like the
creative isn’t hearing you and like they aren’t hitting your targets. Although
you are mostly to blame, because you’re often asking for something arbitrary,
and can’t properly articulate it in a standard operating procedure. Your target
is in your head, and you expect people to read your fucking mind. Douche.
The creative gives birth to
art. And, their art is their baby. If people don’t treat their baby with care, you’re
going to see steam blow out of their ears.
This doesn’t mean there isn’t
room for constructive criticism. Of course, there is. But if you can’t be tactful
in how you deliver it, fuck it. You might as well tear the creative a new asshole
and ask them to hand over their over-leveraged life.
The greatest sin, though, is to
ask the creative to change their workflow when you’re getting awesome results from
their work.
Author Dan Kennedy says he gets
on the phone with several clients every single week just to convince them to
keep their high ROI ads running. Those entrepreneurs get bored of running the
same ads but that doesn’t make a fuck load of difference. Keep doing what’s
working. Wise words. Burn them into your thick skull.
Stop trying to be an artist in
your business, dipshit. You’ve already got one.
You think the creative doesn’t
know when
he’s being exploited? Trust me – he’s not in the dark about any of it. And,
he might bottle it up for a while, but he’s bound to burst at some point. If
you don’t mind losing him, screw it. But if you have any desire to keep your
talent, you’d better shape up or ship out, fuck tard.
When humans get bored, they
invent problems that don’t exist.
I don’t care how boring or mundane
your job is. Stop inventing problems that don’t exist. Don’t force your people through
those blood-stained gates. Get them to keep doing what’s working, ass wipe.
- Anderson
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